Beverly Hills Chihuahua 2 (2011) 🐶 From Papi’s Love Poems to Delgado’s Trauma Dump — 🎬 Trailer Lets start by showing y’all the trailers shall we? — 📖 Non-Spoiler Plot Overview The sequel drops the Aztec warrior lore (probably too expensive) and swaps it for “puppies and family values.” Chloe and Papi are now parents…
Category: Never Again
Beverly Hills Chihuahua (2008)
Beverly Hills Chihuahua (2008) 🐶 The Chihuahuas Will Rise — and So Will Your Eyebrows — 🎬 Trailers Lets start by showing y’all the trailers shall we? — 📖 Non-Spoiler Plot Overview On paper, it’s “rich lady’s spoiled Chihuahua gets lost in Mexico and has to find her way home.” In practice, it’s a Disney…
Marley and Me (2008)
🐶 Marley & Me (2008) Review – Emotional Blackmail: The Movie Trailers 🎥 Let’s start with showing you all the trailers, shall we? If you only watched the trailer, you’d think this was a fun rom-com with Jennifer Aniston and Owen Wilson trying to raise a wild puppy. All slapstick. All “Marley chews the couch,…
The Call Of The Wild (2020)
The Call of the Wild (2020) When your co-star is an uncanny valley nightmare — 🎥 Opening Let’s start with showing you all the trailers, shall we? — Non-Spoiler Thoughts This movie is such a weird contradiction. On one hand, it’s visually stunning — sweeping shots of snowy landscapes, rivers, mountains, and a kind of…
A Dogs Purpose (2017)
A Dog’s Purpose (2017) 🐶 “A Movie or Just Emotional Blackmail?” — Let’s start with showing you all the trailers, shall we? Since this is a Universal film, Y’all know what that means? Cue the Universal Logo! — 🐾 Non-Spoiler Thoughts This movie? 0/10. Not even pity points. It’s not a film—it’s a weaponized tear…
Isle of Dogs (2018)
Isle of Dogs (2018) 🐕 “When Wes Anderson makes a dog movie but forgets people actually love dogs.” — Lets start by showing y’all the trailers shall we? 🎬 Trailer / Opening Hype When Isle of Dogs was first teased, it looked like a slam dunk: Wes Anderson doing stop-motion again, but this time about…
Now You See Me: Now You Don’t (2025)
Now You See Me: Now You Don’t (2025) “Now You See Me 3: Now You Don’t… Because I Stopped Watching” 🎩✨ Let’s start by showing y’all the trailers, shall we? 🎬 — ⚠️ Content Warning Sustained peril, gunfire, and a dangerous overdose of “we swear this is clever” dialogue. May cause whiplash from eye-rolling too…
Death on the Nile (2022)
Death on the Nile (2022) “A Gorgeous Cruise With No Destination” — 🎬 Let’s start by showing y’all the trailers, shall we? — 📝 Non-Spoiler Plot Overview Detective Hercule Poirot (Kenneth Branagh) returns for another round of extravagant sleuthing, this time aboard a glamorous cruise ship sailing the Nile. A newlywed couple’s honeymoon turns into…
Murder on the Orient Express (2017)
🚂 Murder on the Orient Express (2017) A mystery that derails before the final stop — 🎬 Let’s start by showing y’all the trailers shall we? — 📖 Non-Spoiler Plot Overview Agatha Christie’s classic novel gets another lavish adaptation, this time with Kenneth Branagh directing and starring as Hercule Poirot — the man with the…
See How They Run (2022)
🎭 See How They Run (2022) A whodunit that whodidn’t — 🎬 Let’s start by showing y’all the trailers shall we? — 📖 Non-Spoiler Plot Overview London, 1950s. The West End theater scene is buzzing with The Mousetrap. Everything’s dramatic, champagne glasses clink, backstage egos clash—then boom, a murder happens. Adrien Brody’s sleazy director Leo…
Judicious Jarrod's Every-Flavor Entertainment and Media Reviews 