👻 SADAKO VS. KAYAKO (2016)

🎬 “Freddy vs. Jason Walked So This Could Trip Over Itself”


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🎥 Let’s start by showing y’all the trailers, shall we?

Yes, this was real. Yes, someone said “greenlight it” with a straight face.


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❗Quick Note Before We Begin:

Yep—we’re doing it. We’re talking about Sadako vs. Kayako… the film where someone said “hey, what if the Grudge ghost and the Ring ghost fought each other like it’s the Supernatural Olympics?”

Oh, and this came out in 2016, officially proving that by the mid-2010s, J-horror franchises were clinging to life like a VHS tape in a streaming world.

This is what happens when franchises run out of ideas and just throw ghost girls at each other like Pokémon.

Oh and this will be the only J Horror I’ll be reviewing because this one had to be disguised, it’s awful.


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📼 Non-Spoiler Plot Rundown:

Two college girls accidentally watch the cursed Ring video—oops, better figure that out! Meanwhile, another girl moves into the house haunted by Kayako and Toshio—double oops! So what’s the solution?

Obviously, it’s “let’s make Sadako and Kayako fight each other and cancel each other out like a haunted math equation.”

Because logic.


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🧍 Character Rundown:

Yuri & Natsumi – The unlucky college girls. One is cursed. The other… is there.

Suzuka – Moves into the Grudge house next door. She deserves better.

Keizo – Psychic dude with a man bun and leather gloves. Imagine if David Blaine and anime had a baby.

Tamao – Creepy blind girl who talks in cryptic horror-isms.

Sadako – Ring ghost, still into VHS and long hair in faces.

Kayako – Grudge ghost, still croaking and dragging limbs down stairs.

Toshio – Yep. He’s still around too, meowing like a goth Furby.



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✅ Pros:

Some good visual nods to both franchises.

One or two actual spooky setups (before it gets goofy).

If you’ve ever wanted a cursed tape + haunted house combo… here it is.



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❌ Cons:

Absurd premise – No one asked for a ghost wrestling match.

Over-the-top psychic characters – Anime cosplay energy levels: 1000%.

Ruins both mythologies – Turns Sadako and Kayako into tools for a dumb supernatural showdown.

Dumb ending – “Let’s merge them!” Why. Why would you do that. WHY.



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💭 Final Thoughts:

This isn’t a horror film. This is fanfic gone feral.
By 2016, both The Ring and The Grudge were sputtering creatively—and this was the wheezing gasp that proved it.

The creepy ambiguity of both ghosts? GONE.
The dread of a curse you accidentally stumble into? FORGOTTEN.
Now we got anime psychics doing rituals to make VHS ghost and staircase ghost collide like Beyblades.

This whole thing feels like a parody of itself. Like a YouTube video called “Who Would Win: Ghost Edition.”

Let’s be real: Freddy vs. Jason started this. And ever since then, studios looked at it and thought, “Yo, let’s do this but with EVERYTHING.”
Hence:

Batman v Superman – because punching solves trauma

Godzilla vs Kong – monkey vs lizard because sure

Sadako vs Kayako – because… J-horror fans hate peace?


This “VS” trend has killed nuance. Nobody comes to these movies for combat. We came for tension, atmosphere, and disturbing buildup. Instead, we get WWE Presents: Curse Smackdown.


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🎯 Rating: 3/10

🎬 Franchises on life support.
📼 Sadako needs a new manager.
📱 Kayako deserved better than ghost Mortal Kombat.


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🚨 Spoiler Warning!

If you’re still with me, we’re diving headfirst into cursed territory. Hold onto your neck and your VHS tapes.


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💀 Spoiler Breakdown:

Yuri and Natsumi watch the Ring tape. Natsumi starts seeing signs she’s cursed. Meanwhile, Suzuka is drawn to the Saeki house (Grudge house) and starts seeing Toshio and hearing Kayako’s croaks.

Enter Keizo the psychic and his sidekick Tamao, who hatch the genius plan: have both girls cursed at the same time, so Sadako and Kayako show up at the same time, and fight each other. Boom. Problem solved.

They try to do this at the haunted house because, of course, let’s stack our curses like a haunted Jenga tower. Both ghosts show up—and yep, they throw hands. Sort of. It’s mostly shaky camera, long hair, and screeching sounds like a banshee catfight.

But WAIT—then it goes completely off the rails.

Instead of canceling each other out, Sadako and Kayako merge into a grotesque ghost fusion monster with eight limbs and black hair for days. It gets a name too: Sadakaya. Like a cursed K-pop idol from hell.

Everyone dies. That’s it. No curse is lifted. No victory. Just death.
The end tease? The cursed video now features the merged monster, which spreads like a virus online.

Congrats. You didn’t stop the curse. You gave it a reboot.