Superman III (1983)

🎞️ Let’s start by showing y’all the trailers, shall we?

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📝 Non-Spoiler Plot Rundown:

Superman returns for round three… but this time the enemy isn’t just a villain — it’s the script itself. Clark goes back to Smallville. Richard Pryor invents super-hacking and ends up building a doomsday computer. A fake kryptonite turns Superman into a moody alcoholic. There’s skiing, a giant keyboard, and the Tower of Pisa gets gaslit. This isn’t a superhero movie. It’s a fever dream dressed in tights.


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🧍‍♂️ Character Breakdown:

Clark Kent / Superman (Christopher Reeve) – Still giving his all, Reeve delivers both hope and havoc. The junkyard fight where he splits into Evil Superman and Clark is oddly compelling — too bad it’s surrounded by nonsense.

Gus Gorman (Richard Pryor) – A computer genius who accidentally becomes a villain… but it’s really just Richard Pryor doing Richard Pryor things. He skis off buildings and pretends to be a general. Superman believes all of it. You will not.

Lana Lang (Annette O’Toole) – Honestly the most human and heartfelt part of the movie. She outshines Lois (who is barely in it) and brings actual warmth to Smallville.

Ross Webster (Robert Vaughn) – The Dollar Tree Lex Luthor. His big evil plan? Destroy Colombia’s coffee industry. Truly, the stakes have never been lower.

Lois Lane (Margot Kidder) – She’s here for five minutes, says “I’m going on vacation!” and bounces. Iconic exit.



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✅ Pros:

That junkyard brawl between Good Clark and Evil Superman? Chef’s kiss.

Lana Lang feels like a real person in a movie full of cartoons.

Richard Pryor can be funny… when he isn’t skiing off rooftops.

There’s something so bizarre, it’s almost endearing — like a weird dream you kind of liked?



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❌ Cons:

Superman doesn’t recognize kryptonite. Literally holds it in his hand and goes “gee thanks.”

Gus pretends to be a military general and Supes just buys it. No follow-up questions.

The villains have the charisma of stale cereal.

That killer computer scene at the end feels like Saw for toddlers.

Lois Lane deserved better. Much better.

The tonal shift is whiplash-inducing: heartfelt moments smashed against cartoon slapstick.

It’s like the writers forgot it was a Superman movie and just wrote “stuff.”



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💭 Final Thoughts:

Superman III is a weird movie. Not terrible, but definitely a midlife crisis in superhero form. It’s the kind of film that accidentally reinvents itself as a comedy halfway through and just rolls with it. At its core, there’s a fun idea — Superman battling his own inner demons — but it’s buried under office pranks, computer mumbo jumbo, and a villain who cares more about coffee than conquest. If you love chaos, this one’s got it in spades.


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⭐ Rating: 5/10

(Because even when Superman’s trash, he still throws a good punch.)


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⚠️ Spoilers Ahead!


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🤯 Spoiler Breakdown:

Gus Gorman becomes a hacker overnight and gets hired by evil rich guy Ross Webster to sabotage oil and satellites.

They invent synthetic kryptonite but screw up the ingredients, so it turns Superman evil instead of dead.

Evil Supes starts drinking, flirting, and ruining monuments (he straightens the Leaning Tower of Pisa).

The junkyard fight? Clark literally beats the evil out of himself. Yes, fists are therapy now.

The climax involves a massive supercomputer with its own mind that shoots lasers, traps people in wires, and turns Ross’s sister into a Robo-Karen.

Gus changes his mind and helps Superman unplug the evil motherboard.

Superman thanks Gus and flies off. Gus… just walks into the next scene like it’s open mic night. Roll credits.