Cuckoo: Let’s start by showing y’all the trailers shall we?

So I firstly wanna get this out of the way and just say this film is weird, like extremely weird…..there’s no way to put it, now that’s not to say weird is a bad thing, but I’ll explain in the spoilers….so, for now, for now, let’s get the rating out of the way so we can get into spoilers….

Overall, I found myself enjoying this film, although the ending will definitely break it or make it for tons of people…heck to me it kinda felt like an out-of-place ending, also this film will leave u with tons of questions….some of get answered, while the rest nah….

The best way I can even remotely describe this film without spoilers is, that it’s like if ur trying to solve a puzzle, while ur friend is tossing away pieces of the puzzle when u place them together…oh and ur drunk off ur A$$. Yeah, that’s the best way I can even come close to describing this film and its bizarreness….

Also, this film for the first half is very much a horror mystery, then the second half becomes this sci-fi horror….Also, this film is a dark comedy, there are comedic parts in this film….

Idk, half of this film is perfect for me, the other half not so much….as stated this film is just strange, it will probably give u a headache trying to figure out how anything in this film made sense….

I’ll also get into the spoilers how the ending kind of felt disappointing, and also how it just stops feeling scary….yeah spoiler alert the ending stopped feeling scary when u found out what the creature is….

From what I can tell, I think the plot of the film Is like a message on how society thinks women’s places in life should be. Idk I’m trying to make any lick of sense of this script…..for all I know I’ve completely looked over the message of the film, but the issue is the message is piled under tons of nonsense….

Also to understand how bizarre this film is, the company who made this film “Neon” are the same ones who gave us that other horror movie recently “Lonlegs” which stars Nicolas Cage….yeah that’s enough said…

Also, to me Neon is very much the brother company to A24, they both make some strange bizarre films…

So I’ll give this film a solid 6.9/10, warning spoilers ahead y’all been warned…

So thus film opens up with a wife with her father arguing in the kitchen while their young daughter Is trying to sleep, although she hears a really weird screeching noise from the first that starts making her twitch sporadically…

Then she heads out of the house and runs off into the forest, huh? Oh, and the wife got killed so the father pops his head out and answers a phone where he ominously says in a Russian accent, she got away…the guy on the other end says u can’t keep allowing this to happen…then he closes the door, then the title Cuckoo appears on the screen…

Ok then….so the film officially starts with our main character Gretchen (played by Hunter Schafer) is heading out with her father, also his new wife and her daughter named Alma to Germany to live a new life while the father builds houses for this German guy named Herr Konig (played by Dan Stevens)..

Anyway, Gretchen hates his new sister and mother, especially the sister….she refuses to acknowledge her as her sister, why does she hate her? Because the little girl can’t talk for some reason….so she speaks through sign language…

So they get to the resort that’s called Resort Alps Chatten…. Anyway, Herr Konig greets them in a German accent…..gotta admit I’m no expert on German language but his German accent I never once bought, it sounded fake….like extremely fake…

BTW spoiler alert he’s the bad guy, yeah sorry had to do that because this film doesn’t hide it…because as soon as he appears on screen he’s already weird…u the audience can tell something is off about him…he’s just saying things that no individual human being would say…

He’s putting his hands around Gretchen the teenager when introducing her to their new neighbor who’s a nurse….who shows up at their house that Herr Konig drives them to….

Yeah, this guy is weird, anyways first day they get to their new gorgeous house….he offers Gretchen a job as a clerk at his Resort…because in his words, not mine “a young woman like u will not have tons to do around here while ur dad is building houses for me…so I’ve been thinking and here’s a proposal, u come to work for me as a clerk at my resort”

Yeah, quick question, who talks like this? This is weird….

Also, this film has too much obvious foreshadowing, where Herr Konig keeps saying words like..

“The Cuckoo Bird”

“Welcome to my nest”

“What a cute bird u brought with u” (he’s talking about the husband’s new wife)

Also there’s 1 or 2 shots of a cuckoo clock…going “cuckoo, cuckoo, cuckoo”

Yeah, haven’t y’all got it by now? Isn’t this just so subtle!?

Anyway on Gretchen’s first day…she gets taught by a woman named Trixie…..also this woman and her husband come in, and the woman eventually vomits on the floor…the husband takes her outside where she continues to vomit….uh eww….

Anyways Herr Konig tells Gretchen he’ll pick her up in 1 hour, she says she has a bike he tells her it’s not safe it’s dark out….ok something is really off about him don’t u agree?

Later on back at home Gretchen is playing the guitar at home while wearing headphones and listening to music, her sister enters the room….the girl hears the screeching from the forest…..Zhe starts contorting….Gretchen finally notices her sister….she asks what ur doing here….

Then a time loop happens, we see this scene happen 3 times in a row…always with Gretchen saying what u doing here, while her sister is contorting….also the girl ends up slapping Gretchen when she gets close to her ouch….

Anyway, on another shift Gretchen is working alone…..because Trixie goes out on a date, and Gretchen falls asleep….also Gretchen explains to her how she doesn’t enjoy her new sister, that her sister had a chance of having a sibling but she ate her brother because in the womb the son shrunk, so the baby absorbed the body for nutritions….uh huh, Gretchen ur weird…

So this shift she falls asleep, and this woman named Beth (played by Jessica Henwick)….she asks for a room also she brings up a pack of beer for her to pay for because there’s a shop at the start of this resort….

So she gives her keys, also Beth puts her hand on Gretchen as Gretchen is asking is the room for 1 or more people…and Beth says for now just 1….then the both of them see this woman entering the room and vomiting on the floor…. What the heck is going on? These 2 vomit situations that happened to 2 women so far….

So that night she closes up and is about to head out but gets a call from Herr…he tells her he’s coming to pick her up, but she heads out on the bike because she’s fine…

He makes it there to the resort as she has just left…so she’s heading home on the bike while wearing headphones….which leads us to this unnerving scene that we see in the trailer, also here’s the clip…

So as u can see, she’s riding along while this woman runs extremely fast out of a condo towards her….Gretchen then eventually notices a second shadow behind her, she looks behind her to see this creepy ass woman wearing sunglasses, but has glowing red eyes, is wearing a brown coat, and has a hood on…is running towards her while screeching loudly…

On a side note beside finding this scene scary, gotta be real with u I don’t find the design of this horror creature all that scary. She basically looks like a normal middle aged woman dressed up as she’s about to go shopping at TJ-Max or something like that….I wouldn’t say that’s a scary look…

The idea was to make her look like she can blend into society, will having the expectations that she wouldn’t do that….so idk what the director was even going for here…because never once does this screeching red eyed lady try blending into society, nor does she seem like she could fit in society…

Because once again she doesn’t talk she just screeches, also she has bright red pupils….oh yes totally normal, it all checks out…..sighhh

Anyways, Gretchen rides up to a hospital, and begs to be let in…she bangs her head hard against the door by accident when being let in the first door…so she gets the scar stopped….btw yes she hit the door that hard she bled, and cracked the door….somehow…

The cops there taking notes on her story, but they don’t believe her…

Also, Alma gets brought to the hospital where she must stay at now because she has a Seizure….the parents are concerned….also the father starts blaming Gretchen because the nurse asks has there been any stress in the house….wow such a great father…

The next day she goes to work a cop guy named Detective Henrey comes in…she says she doesn’t want to talk about the incident and someone is behind him in line…

He whispers to her to come to see him after her shift…so the woman behind him is Beth…she tells her she’s checking out, and she hands back the keys…she says don’t I need to pay, Gretchen says no….and Beth says to Gretchen do u smoke? They both go out and kiss each other while Gretchen is holding a cigarette….on a side note tell me if u think this is slightly wrong, thus the slightly older woman is hitting on a young teenage woman….uhhhhhh, moving on….

So she says come with me to Italy, so Gretchen goes in the resort steals all the money, and rides off with Beth….

Where there driving while sharing a cigarette, then the screeching happens…then the time loop happens, this plays out over and over again until Gretchen starts noticing, just then she sees the same woman she saw that night, straight ahead of them…

They swirl off the road and crash, Gretchen wakes up to that strange woman trying to break into the car but Gretchen hears a gunshot go off then she faints…

She wakes up in a hospital with a brace around her broken arm and a bandage around her head….she goes back to sleep after seeing her dad there…she wakes up to Herr sitting there talking to her weirdly….he says “Are u able to smell? Or is it ur cells in ur nose that are letting u smell? In this moment right now are ur cells rebuilding themselves? I wouldn’t leave this place to go back home until your cells reheal so u don’t get injured anymore, can u do that for me?”

Again who speaks like this!? What normal person talks like this?

Anyway, the dad comes, gives her headphones, and tells her he’s going home…she wants him to stay with her, but she’s afraid the woman will come back….the father yells at her saying u stole the store’s money! Then drove off with a stranger! I can’t control what u do!

But u no longer have a job, and u will not be getting any allowance, if u wanna drive away u just go now and take a bus…..wow just wow, that’s not a way u treat ur daughter who just barely survived a car crash….

So she calls up her original mother, spoiler alert the mother is dead, it’s just she likes hearing the voice machine of her…she talks to her, to cope with her death….that’s so sad…

So Detective Henry comes in and asks her for her help to lure out the creature, he promises he will take care of her….he will drive her to wherever she wants afterward….

So they decide to do a stakeout, the detective tells his story that he lost his wife to the creature……his wife started vomiting, and drowned in her own vomit….he couldn’t save her….she puts 2 and 2 together that she witnessed 2 women vomit in the resort….he asks where were they staying at? She says the room is a romance sweet…

So they go stake out the romance sweet where Henry witnesses Trixie having an affair with a cop…..he tells her they need to leave, so she goes dries her hair…as that happens the cop hears a screech….time loop happens, and the hybrid appears in the house….then we get a jumpscare where she appears in front of the doorway to Trixie bedroom….

The jumpscare is caused via jump cut they do, where she just basically appears close to the door when she was in the hallway….to me that’s the laziest form of a jumpscare….if jumpscares weren’t already lazy…

We then see the hybrid do (and I wish I was kidding and also wish I could reword this better but) she gets on the floor, and Trixie gets on the bed because she’s been mind controlled by the creature…the creature then pulls out what I can only describe as Cum liquid out of her down- down area…

Then starts rubbing it on the woman’s legs, yep….I did say this film is weird…

So the detective runs in, and so does Gretchen…..the detective tries shooting the woman but she runs off….

So Gretchen goes home…wakes up the next day to Herr there handing a wooden flute to Alma…yeah she’s her at the moment, the parents are watching….

He asks if they woke up Gretchen, and she asks why are we living here….the parents try to get her to be quiet, and Herr says no it’s fine plz continue….she says why do we live here? Because my dad is making homes yes I know..but why here? Is it because the backyard is gorgeous?…

Then Herr uses the flute towards the outside for no reason, he then says “ur here because u and ur family belong here” which Gretchen points out and says “That’s a Fucking weird way to put it!” Yeah, she’s not wrong…also I’m realizing something why’s everyone in this film being oblivious to the weirdness of Herr Konig…but no one reacts to his weirdness, but Gretchen notices it….

He tells her w package came for them, she says what package…she runs over and sees the package is from their old house…she asks the father to explain, he tells her I sold the old house….so Gretchen slaps him…the box breaks open, the stuff falls out…she breaks out into tears because she’s sad….

Also, we the audience find out that in the box she knocked over, there’s a cassette tape with a recording of her mom’s voice….so let me try to understand this Gretchen has been using a smartphone to contact her dead mom’s answering machine that has a cassette tape?

What time period does this film take place in? Plz explain director!? Can something make any form of sense in this film?

So let’s go to the third act, Gretchen wants to leave….so Herr offers to drive her away (keep in mind this is happening while her family is at the hospital with Alma), so she leaves a note saying don’t find me…then heads out with Herr in his car…

He ends up driving her to a random building.

He shows her that they have Detective Henry, and he tells her he’s no longer a cop….he was fired from his job long ago. And now he’s gonna have his men (who are other cops) deal with him…

He then takes Gretchen into a pool room with no water, instead, there’s a bed in the pool….he sprays her with Fairmones and then locks the door on her…

What a twist he’s a bad guy, except not really a twist because it was quite obvious…because in every scene he’s been in he’s just been a complete weirdo…..so he explains to her overcom that he is the head of this experiment where he habitats these hybrid human species that are very close to a cuckoo bird…because just like a cuckoo bird they place their egg into another nest to give birth to…

Getting the metaphors here yet? Are y’all starting to catch on?

Also, he explains that he made these condos for people to come live at, so the hybrid human who’s only known as Mother, btw….can come and impregnate woman’s so her species thrives….for u see this is how this works, Mother impregnates a woman…that woman gives birth to a kid…

Herr lures the wife and husband back there down the line, so the mother hybrid can take that kid away. Raise her and train her to become the new mother to continue the cycle over and over again….ok talk about some body horror type Shtick going on here….

Also, Herr uses a flute to lure the hybrid to him….no idk how or why, this film is allergic to answering things….

Anyway, he summons another of the human species, it’s that girl from the beginning of the film…well, I guess this paid off, kinda….so she hypnotizes Gretchen, and she goes unconscious on the bed….the creature gets to the point of taking the Cum liquid out of her down-down area…

Herr walks in and says that’s enough for the day, also there wearing headphones to prevent the screeching from hypnotizing them…..anyways eventually Gretchen starts vomiting, Herr says oh no u should be on your side so u don’t drown…he then takes a pillow and tries to smother her to death. How’s she gonna get out of this situation?

Just then the detective walks in with a gun, he shoots Herr then kills the hybrid…he then takes Gretchen away to his house, there while she continues to vomit he pulls a Picture that’s in Gretchen’s Jean pocket….it’s a Pic if her father and new wife…..along with Herr in it..

So they both came here a while back ago and had sex at the resort…..Henry puts 2 and 2 together he asks when did ur new mother have Alma? Gretchen says shortly after they came here…..ohhhhhh. he finally realized that the Cuckoo human hybrid impregnated the wife…and Alma is a hybrid…

Hence why she can’t talk. Because those hybrids don’t talk….. oh what a twist, and I’m being serious this time I didn’t see this coming….so good job director, so they both head to the hospital so Gretchen can save Alma….

At the hospital, the wife starts feeling ill, and the nurse neighbor gives her some pills….so the husband takes her home, she’s all drowsy and all that…don’t worry we won’t get to see them again this is their last scene. We get no resolution from the father and wife….btw This is where the film officially goes downhill from here…

Also, did the nurses drug the wife? If so why? Also, did these 2 parents know they were a part of an experiment?

So the 2 of them get to the hospital, and they locate Alma in a room behind 1 view mirror…she’s in a bed hooked up to wires to keep an eye on her brain waves…..just then guess who shows up? Herr….yeah so apparently she survived from getting shot somehow….

Yeah sure ok then, he shows up to the room where the 2 nurses are looking over Alma and are about to let the mother hybrid enter the room…yes the 2 nurses which includes the neighbor nurse is in cahoots with Herr Konig….what a twist?

BTW remember when I said this film officially drops the ball here? Well, he stops the project for some reason, and he then asks the nurse the files/video notes u have down there in ur room here right? They nod their heads, then he turns the corner and grabs a freaking machine gun then shoots them dead…

Sigh, ok so here’s my issue, when the scriptwriters decided to bring in characters including the villains only using guns in the third act…it really comes off as well we had no idea how to end this artsie film…we don’t even know what we’re even doing here…

That’s the vibes I got from this third act, but don’t worry it gets worse…so Henry tries to stop Gretchen from going to save Alma….because he doesn’t want Alma to be saved, she pulls out her butterfly knife she’s had with her this entire film and stabs Henry 2wice…don’t worry he survives somehow…

Gretchen goes and saves Alma, she unplugs her…uses sign language to tell her we have to go, they head down the hall…screeching is happening time loop happens, Gretchen tells Alma to cover her ears and face her…Alma aims her knife at Alma to threaten to the mother if she steps any closer I’ll kill her…..Jesus Gretchen…

Alma eventually notices and runs off, also Gretchen’s headphones fall off…so the hybrid chases them, Gretchen chases Alma into a library room where she now has to hide behind shelves away from the mother…..

Gretchen grabs a pair of earbuds off a printer…..she hides from the mother, and just then the lights turn on… the detective enters the room…just then both Gretchen and the mother do a staring contest with each other….yeah they both just stand there across some bookshelves between the both of them…

So then Henry knocks the shelves onto both ladies, and he then chases Alma out of the room…they run into Herr where Alma continues to run while Herr and Henry do a gun battle against each other…so when did this turn from a horror movie into an action film? I swear this film has 3 different tones….

First act: horror mystery…

The second act: is sci-fi horror…

Third act: action horror…

Can this movie/the director make up their mind on which tone to stick with and just stick with one? Instead of going all willy-nilly?

Anyways so we finally get to see what the mother looks like without her glasses on because they fell off….and the design is underwhelming as F**k all the creature is a middle aged woman with slightly tinted red pupils, and veins around her eyes….nope that’s it, that’s the design of our hybrid…

Womp womp, well talk about a letdown, I preferred her with her glasses on because it made her look like her eyes were sunken back into her head…..so she tries to locate Gretchen who’s stuck underneath some shelves….

Gretchen takes her brace off to reach her knife, the mother hears her grunting so she pulls away the books….they both stare at each other while the mother is screeching, and then Gretchen stabs the mother in the neck with the knife…..

Also If ur wondering how she’s covering her ears with 1 arm, she bent her other arm over her head to cover both ears…except here’s the thing I’m pretty sure when I do that I can still hear noise….so how’s it she’s not able to hear this Cuckoo hybrid screeching which can be heard by a 9-yard distance is beyond me…

She then runs out, and just then the mother comes out of the room behind her then she falls on the floor then dies…well that was anticlimactic….the horror creature died via a stab wound in the kneck…

U know what this reminds me of? That horror game I reviewed Greyhill Incident…where the aliens can die just by 2 shots to the head, making them 1 point up from being superior to humans who die by one shot to the head…..

So anyway she grabs the woman’s hair, which comes off…turns out she’s been wearing a wig, what’s underneath is almost a bald head with barely any strands of hair….womp womp..

So anyways Gretchen goes and tells the 2 men that the mother is dead….Herr starts monologuing and saying he’s gonna kill her…she then tosses the blood-stained wig onto the floor….Herr freezes in shock, Henry starts laughing like a madman…

They both start shooting each other while hiding behind pillars….Gretchen sneaks into the closet to grab Alma, but Alma doesn’t trust her because she aimed a knife at her….Gretchen has a heart-to-heart moment with Alma that her original mom is dead….Alma didn’t know this, she just thought Gretchen missed her mom, so Alma sent notes to the mom telling her to come to visit….oooofff.

Alma asks if will she be coming to visit. Which Gretchen breaks into tears and shakes her head no, I almost teared up at this scene…they both hug it out, and they then head out….she yells at Henry u said u would protect me? Which he says I still stand by that, then she says did u tell that to ur wife? Did u? Which he says yes…so they both walk out…

Both Herr and Henry are aiming guns at both of them while walking….Henry wants Alma dead because she’s a hybrid, and Herr doesn’t want Alma dead because u know his intentions….but what intentions are there now since the mother is dead? Yeah, exactly who knows…

Anyways Alma puts her hands over Gretchen’s ears then Alma screeches…..gasps she’s a cuckoo….or a siren whichever u consider these creatures…..this disorientates both men…so the 2 girls run off, then off screen we hear 2 gunshots go off at the same time. So both Herr and Henry are dead? I think….

Anyway they both head to the door to leave, Gretchen stumbles into the door…but for some reason the door doesn’t open, she seems concerned and then turns around….but then Alma goes and pushes the other door which opens…..hahahahahhaha. yeah, I was expecting a comedic moment right here when the film is about to end…

Oh outside Gretchen’s new girlfriend is there in her hospital gown. Gretchen faints…..she wakes up in the car of her girlfriend where she’s driving Gretchen and Alma away to wherever the hell she’s going to….happy ending, except what happened to the parents? I don’t care. The end…

Jeepers this film left me with too many questions…for examples

1. What happened to their parents after they left? Did they know they were a part of an experiment? If not then it’s pretty F**ked up that random woman drives Gretchen and Alma away to Italy with her…the parents would be looking for them…

2.  Why does The Mother hybrids screeching cause time loops? Heck do the people who get stuck in the time loops realize they are in a time loop?

3. Why does she take the form of a human? Is it to blend into humanity? Except she never once does that in this film, the majority of the time she’s living in the forest. And running out of the forest.

4. Will Alma grow up to be monstrous like The Mother? Will she gain red eyes? Or is this film a message about nurturing?

5. How’s it that Herr can control the creature with a wooden flute? Why a flute out of all things? What specifically said it’s gotta be a flute? Why the flute?

That’s about it…..yeah as u can see I’m really left here with questions….also what’s answered in this film either makes u scratch ur head while saying huh? Ok but why? Or u will be satisfied with the answers that are given….

Anyway hope y’all enjoyed this review, here’s a tease for the next review I’m working on…..