Tomb Raider 2018: Let’s start off with showing yall the trailer shall we?

I’m a survivor!! Sorry I had to do that….so firstly let’s get the rating out of the way…

BTW unfortunately I’ve never seen the Angelina Jolie Tomb Raider movies…yes I know I know I’ve missed out clearly…

Overall in my opinion I think this is a ok movie….it’s a fun action summer blockbuster type movie, but the issue is it’s a boring Tomb Raider movie….which is an issue because that’s what this movie is an adaptation of….

So overall I’ll give this film a solid 7/10….ok from here on out warning ⚠️ spoilers ahead y’all been warned….

So this film kicks off with our titular character named Laura Croft (played by Alicia Vikander) biking down a road and not caring about if she runs into people…..oh boy I can tell she’s gonna be a likable character huh?

Anyway, her father went missing many many years ago, and she badly wants to go search for him….but while that’s happening on top of all that some people are giving her the opportunity to sign over the Croft home to get the money that her father made….she refuses it…

Stupid stupid decision, look lady u come from a line of a rich family and if u get money u could use that money to fund an expedition to go search for ur father…but no instead she keeps saying that’s not the Croft way……ok seriously? Laura Croft in the games is an intelligent person…here she’s a dumb dumb who acts like she’s entitled…..

Entitled to what specifically? Well, we will never know, unfortunately…guess she’s entitled to her morals? Moving on she ends up finding stuff recording of her dad in the basement of her home, oh yes u know those mystical camera recordings that can last over a decade without its battery dying….

Yeah, those recordings, anyways her father on the recording says something about an evil group named Trinity who was after his work so he had to hide it from them and he went missing yada yada…last location he went to was a specific island….

So Laura Croft goes and hires a boatman named Lu Wen (played by Daniel Wu)…..he reluctantly takes her to the island she needs to go to….btw we do get a video game recreation where they find themselves in the middle of a bad severe weather storm ar night in the ocean…

The boat gets split in half, Laura Croft jumps across the boat to the other side of the boat…she ends up waking up on an island with the boat missing……

Anyway, she goes through the jungle on the island and finds a waterfall to cross but if the currents drag her well it drags her off the waterfall luckily there’s a crashed plane across the river she decides to cross it……the plane starts slipping, she hands off for dear life…she finds a parachute and proceeds to fall out of the sky into multiple branches, then gets impaled…

Yep because that checks out, she then pulls the branch out of her leaving an open wound which she doesn’t check or wrap up for the rest of this movie…heck she can just walk and shrug it off like it’s nothing, yep that’s totally checks out…

Anyway she ends up locating her father in a cave…yeah turns out her dad’s alive, he’s been hiding out on this island….trying to prevent anyone from finding the tomb…..because a group named Trinity is after the tomb, a game reference…

Yeah if yall couldn’t tell already, this film tries tying into the Rebooted Trilogy…..anyways we cut to our Trinity bad guys who are trying to open up the tomb….they’ve built a campsite around it, and the entrance won’t open up unless the puzzle is solved…which none of them know how to solve it… a bunch of idiots….

Anyway, we get to see the leader of the group, and it’s Walton Goggins!! Ok, I take back what I said about this movie, this movie is a 10/10 it’s perfect bye bye the end…lol kidding, but no seriously his presence in this film raised points in my opinion…this movie went from being a 4 out of 10 to a 7/10….Walton Goggins can turn even a shitty movie into an entertaining movie…

Anyways eventually Laura shows up along with her father, who reluctantly comes with her, granted he doesn’t want her to go there…why? Because turns out Walton Goggin’s character and his group tried to get her father to lead them to the tomb and open it for them….

But ever since he disappeared and now everyone thinks he’s dead, he wants to keep it that way….plus it’s convenient for him to be hiding out on this same island the tomb is on so he can try to prevent people from going in there…

That’s smart on him…anyways Walton Goggins forces Laura to open the Tomb or else he will shoot her father in front of her…..and the other people he’s holding captive, btw Speaking of the people who are being held captive…that boat guy badly doesn’t want to leave this island without Laura…he for some reason cares about Laura…..why does he care about Laura so much? He only met her for 1 day, and not even that…..

Dude stop simping over her she’s not worth it…. anyway she agrees to open the Tomb, but the dad doesn’t want her to….but she does, and we the audience have to bear witness to her solving a puzzle to open the Tomb for all of like 3 min. How thrilling…

It’s like the equivalent of watching a friend solve a Rubix cube for 5 minutes…..it will get boring very quickly….don’t put puzzles in a movie, that’s for us to do in a game….

Anyway they enter the tomb where there are these 5 different colored crystals she has to put into the door in a correct pattern….the floor starts collapsing so the gang which includes the villains helps out and toss her the crystals….

Anyways they closely fall to their deaths but make it into the tomb….where they find the coffin of the ancient queen…they open up the tomb and the mummy springs up then sits back down…why? Because it was set to s spring to startle anyone who opens it….

Anyway they find out the queen locked herself in here away from humanity because turns out she’s cursed with a virus that if anyone touches her they will rot and die instantly….so Walton Goggins has his men cut her finger off and put it in a bag…he thinks he can weaponize this…that’s dumb…this is dumb….

Just then her dad accidentally touches the corpse and starts dying….he says his goodbyes while the villains escape…then he uses a detonator he has to blow up the tomb…anyways Laura catches up with Walton, and they both Duke it out….she then proceeds to take the bag out of his pocket and sys u messed with the wrong Croft then she shoves it in his mouth then kicks him off the cliff….ooofff..

Anyway she heads home where she finally signs the paper and gets her father’s inheritance which includes his money….then the film ends with a end credit scene of her getting her 2 iconic pistols…setting up for s sequel that will never happen…. anyway the end, hope y’all enjoyed the review…