The Nun II (2023)

“Peekaboo Valak Strikes Again”


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🎥 Let’s start by showing y’all the trailers, shall we?

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📖 Non-Spoiler Plot Overview

So here we are with another Conjuring spinoff. A sequel to The Nun. Ah yes, a sequel that no one asked for to a movie that no one asked for either. And does it go wrong? Absolutely. This film feels like it was either written by AI or by a group of writers who hit “shuffle” on a cliché generator.

The plot? Priests are being killed across Europe, and Irene (Taissa Farmiga) is called out of hiding to investigate. She reluctantly teams up with a younger nun (Storm Reid), and they track the trail to a Christian boarding school where Frenchie is now working. Surprise: he’s still possessed. Valak wants an ancient relic hidden in the school, but instead of just grabbing it, she spends 90% of the movie playing hide-and-seek with kids.

Meanwhile, we get the usual tropes: bullied kids, forbidden rooms, ghost children, romantic subplots no one cares about, and of course… endless jump scares that wouldn’t spook a toddler.


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👥 Character Rundown

Sister Irene (Taissa Farmiga): Haunted by her last run-in with Valak, dragged back into the same nonsense.

Debra (Storm Reid): New nun sidekick. Doesn’t fully believe in her faith because we’ve definitely never seen that trope before.

Frenchie (Jonas Bloquet): Still possessed, now hanging out at a boarding school, falling in love with a teacher, and trying to protect her daughter.

Valak / The Nun (Bonnie Aarons): Supposedly terrifying. In reality? Spends most of the runtime peeking out of corners like she’s playing peekaboo.

Supporting Cast: Bullies, teachers, nuns, and kids who exist mostly to be scared, possessed, or stabbed.



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🕰️ Pacing / Flow

A slog. The A-plot tries to be a detective story about murdered priests. The B-plot is Valak searching for a relic. They don’t mesh, so instead the movie keeps spinning its wheels in the boarding school. Ninety-five percent of the runtime is just padding: kids bullied, Frenchie wandering around, Irene sighing at crucifixes, Valak showing up to screech and vanish.


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✅ Pros

The shadow of Valak walking in giant form outside the church early on is actually cool.

The magazine scene where pages flip into the shape of a nun? Also decent. Too bad it was spoiled in the trailer.

Honestly that’s it.



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❌ Cons

Valak is not scary. Peekaboo in corners, screeches, vanishes. That’s not horror, that’s a bad prank.

Everything is recycled horror tropes: creepy ball in the hallway, bullies, haunted forbidden rooms, shadow figures, cheap jump scares.

Goat demon. Yes, there’s a literal goat demon that looks like it came out of Narnia.

The whole subplot with Frenchie and the teacher/mother is filler nobody cares about.

The artifact hunt? Discount Indiana Jones. Light beams, stone slabs, digging by hand.

Predictability: we know Valak survives because Conjuring 2 exists. Zero tension.

Mid-credit scene with Ed and Lorraine Warren? Utterly pointless.



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😬 Valak’s Downfall

This is the part that stings. In Conjuring 2, Valak was terrifying. She had presence, menace, and her hallway scene gave people nightmares. In The Nun II? She’s reduced to playing pranks like a Scooby-Doo villain. She could grab the relic at any time but instead spends the entire movie jump-scaring children and hiding in corners. It’s embarrassing. She went from the scariest entity in the franchise to the most pathetic.


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🤔 Final Thoughts

I don’t know why I hoped for something better. Fool me once, shame on you, Nun. Fool me twice, shame on me. This movie is just two hours of clichés with none of the scares. Valak has gone from “scary demon nun” to “peekaboo babysitter.” The story is a mess, the scares are limp, and the timeline robs the film of any tension.

Please, for the love of God, no more Nun movies.

Rating: 1/10
Crap, crap, all crap. Avoid. Don’t give Warner Bros. your money.


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⚠️ Spoilers Ahead! ⚠️

We open with a boy fetching wine for a priest. A ball rolls down the hallway. He kicks it into the dark. It comes back. He kicks it again. It comes back. Then Valak levitates the priest and sets him on fire. Oooh, so spooky. 😑

Frenchie is back, still possessed, working at a boarding school. He befriends a little girl who’s bullied by the mean kids and flirts with her teacher-mom. Meanwhile, the head nun has locked away a forbidden room because her son died in there. Guess where the relic is hidden? That’s right. In that room.

The bullies lure the girl into the locked room to play a “Goat Demon” game (because apparently that’s a thing now). They stare at a goat in the windowpane until it comes alive and attacks. Yes, really.

Valak spends most of the film just tormenting kids instead of going after the relic she supposedly wants. She finally kills the head nun by impaling her on a statue.

Irene and Debra arrive, follow a random clue, and somehow deduce that Frenchie is possessed by Valak and that the relic is hidden in the wine cellar. How? Script says so.

Third act: Frenchie goes full Valak, chases the little girl, and fights Irene. Meanwhile, the bullies and Debra are chased by a literal goat demon that looks awful. The relic is found under a stone slab, and Valak grabs it to power up. Now she has glowing yellow eyes. Didn’t she already?

Final showdown: Irene and Debra pray over wine barrels to turn them into the Blood of Christ. The barrels burst open, the wine turns to blood, and Valak is drowned and burned to bones. Except we know she’s not dead because she shows up in Conjuring 2.

The film ends with Frenchie surviving, Irene staring off into nothing, and then a pointless mid-credit scene where Ed and Lorraine Warren answer a phone call. That’s it.

Lazy, predictable, trope-filled nonsense.