Ghostbusters (2016)

“Bustin’ Makes Me Cry.” 👻🤦‍♂️


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🎥 Let’s start by showing y’all the trailers, shall we?

(And yes — even the trailers were misleading. They promised a reboot with fresh energy. Instead, we got neon ghosts, fart jokes, and a plot copy-pasted from 1984 with worse execution.)


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Non-Spoiler Plot Overview

This reboot takes the classic Ghostbusters formula and strips it of everything that worked — character chemistry, subtle comedy, and iconic scares. Instead, it tries to replace them with loud jokes, neon visual effects, and cameos that feel like parodies of themselves.

The story follows four women: Erin Gilbert (Kristen Wiig), Abby Yates (Melissa McCarthy), Jillian Holtzmann (Kate McKinnon), and Patty Tolan (Leslie Jones). Together, they form the new Ghostbusters to stop an embittered janitor named Rowan who plans to unleash ghosts upon New York.

Sounds familiar? Yeah, because it’s basically the original plot with every choice made worse.


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Character Rundown

Erin (Kristen Wiig) – Former skeptic turned believer. Bland and awkward, never finds her footing.

Abby (Melissa McCarthy) – Over-the-top scientist with zero of the charm she usually brings to roles.

Holtzmann (Kate McKinnon) – The quirky inventor who at least tries to bring energy. She’s the one highlight.

Patty (Leslie Jones) – The “everywoman” who becomes unbearable because the script has her scream every line instead of delivering jokes.

Kevin (Chris Hemsworth) – Their secretary, portrayed as so stupid it’s insulting. He can’t answer a phone, confuses his eyes for ears, and becomes a villain’s meat puppet.

Rowan (Neil Casey) – A ghost-obsessed janitor. Instead of an intimidating Gozer, we get… a sulky guy who dies and possesses Kevin.



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Pacing / Episode Flow

The pacing is chaotic. It feels like a series of improv sketches taped together with neon slime. Instead of building tension, every scene stops dead so characters can riff or scream at each other. The finale drags endlessly with CGI noise drowning out anything resembling tension.


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Pros

Kate McKinnon’s Holtzmann is fun — eccentric and at least trying to carry some charm.

A few ghost designs had potential… before being smothered in glowing neon effects.



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Cons

Recycled plot from the 1984 classic, only louder and dumber.

Neon ghosts look like a bad Disneyland light show.

The villain is pathetic — a janitor with a grudge? Really?

Cameos from the original actors feel forced and cringey (Bill Murray literally dies as a ghost skeptic 🤦‍♂️).

Leslie Jones’s Patty is written as pure stereotype, reduced to shouting and streetwise “sass.”

Chris Hemsworth’s Kevin is offensively dumb — it stops being funny and just feels mean.

Juvenile comedy: fart jokes, slime vomit, and (no kidding) blasting a giant ghost in the nuts.



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Final Thoughts

The worst part isn’t even that Ghostbusters (2016) is bad — it’s that it feels like it doesn’t understand what made the original work. The original blended comedy with genuine supernatural dread. This? It’s a glowstick parade with weak improv and a script that thinks louder = funnier.

And those cameos? Painful. They don’t feel like tributes — they feel like mockery. Watching Ray, Winston, and Bill Murray reduced to throwaway punchlines is just depressing.

Rating: 1/10. 👎👻


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🚨 Spoiler Warning 🚨

Full spoilers from here on out — but honestly, the “plot” is already spoiled by existing.


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Spoilers

Rowan, the janitor villain, spends the film whining about not fitting in. Instead of being intimidating like Gozer, he offs himself and then… possesses Kevin. Yup, Chris Hemsworth, reduced to dancing around like a possessed Ken doll.

The “final battle” is just noise. The women line up with proton packs against an army of neon ghosts. There’s no suspense, just lasers on screen. Eventually, Rowan transforms into the Ghostbusters logo ghost — I wish I was joking. They literally fight a giant version of the thing on the poster.

How do they beat it? By crossing the streams… and shooting him in the nuts. Yep. The big climax of this reboot is the Ghostbusters zapping a giant cartoon ghost’s crotch.

Meanwhile, the cameos are insulting:

Bill Murray plays a skeptic who gets tossed out a window.

Dan Aykroyd appears as a taxi driver who literally says, “I ain’t afraid of no ghosts,” before driving off.

Ernie Hudson shows up as Patty’s uncle — his role is nothing more than a wink to the camera.

Sigourney Weaver is tossed in during the credits as Holtzmann’s mentor.


Every cameo feels less like a thank-you and more like the film patting itself on the back for remembering the original.

The film ends with the Ghostbusters victorious, of course, but the real horror is the tease at the end: a tape recorder playing the word “Zuul.” It sets up a sequel that mercifully never happened.


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👉 And that’s the tragedy here. Ghostbusters (2016) wanted to be a fresh start but ended up being a loud, unfunny parody of itself. Instead of bustin’ making me feel good, this one just made me want to turn the TV off.